{"id":519,"date":"2009-10-30T22:06:06","date_gmt":"2009-10-30T22:06:06","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lauraanntull.com\/acting\/?p=519"},"modified":"2011-11-14T22:06:57","modified_gmt":"2011-11-14T22:06:57","slug":"life","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lauraanntull.com\/acting\/?p=519","title":{"rendered":"Life……"},"content":{"rendered":"

What is wrong with this world.  I’ve lost everything, and I’ve never done anything wrong.  OK.  I am not perfect.  I am certainly not what my parents wanted.  I never was.  I was always into live music and bands and art.  I wanted to break out and be the real me and live.  I seriously want to ride a Vespa one day and feel the wind on my face.  I had my youth stolen from me by a car accident. 
<\/a>I never did anything but disobey my parents.  I’m an adult.  I have the right to live my life.  they held be back as did others.  I am delusional.  But the world is.  I know I have had good looking men want me, and my family keeps trying to treat me like I am ugly and I hate them for it.  It is actions that do tell all.  I can act and that is who I am. I feel like people don’t want to know I can act, or the fact that I can is being held against me.  And yet I for one could never use my gifts for anything wrong.  That is the point of striving to do the right thing.  God gave me an imagination.  But he did not make me into a liar.  I don’t know how many times people have told me they could trust me and I did not let them down.  I don’t steal.  I never did or would.  And soon I predict I will lose everything and the real crooks and the real bad people in my life are those trying to blame their own weaknesses in others.  Lets find a scap goat for the horrible show we wrote.  I loved one show.  I loved it allot.  So why did they use me to hurt me.  Why did they take from me my happiness?  Why don’t people just let others be happy?  Why is it that people want me to go back home to the east coast to be in pain or so I can live there and prove I would be.  If STATE farm is behind any of this…. they owe me.  Their lawyers lied and I know it.  And they could have done this to me back east when I still lived there.  I was in pain here too.  they can ask around and find out.  I have receipts from where I ordered tape.  I remember I even had it delivered to my house in Pasadena when I was working on Carnivale.  Taping my knee really ripped up my skin too.  I was glad when I found out I could stop.  That was in 2003\/4- six years after the accident.  And if I am right, I was robbed of years of my life again by ABC, and people there knew I would be in pain, including a man who works as a Manager in this town who knows Marquessa Moreland.  And don’t you dare block people from seeing this site…..  you will just be proving that you are guilty of fraud.  ABC and the people from ELI STONE are guilty or fraud…..  And they hired a woman who knows she lied to be a star.  Welcome to the new America.  Where if you can play unfair, you win all.  If you have a conscious and are determined to act no matter what… you lose all.  I am not going to make it as an actress, but to me if I quit I have no choice but death or spending the rest of my life in an institution.  Because I loved my life, and they took it from me on lies, so I will not work until I know I can do what I enjoy and love.  I gave my parents what they wanted and all it did was make me want to end my life.  I hated my experiences in court.  I really did.  In fact, it was partially do to what happened in court that turned me off to the legal professional all together.  While I am scared that I will never have the active life i had before my accident, I had to listen to the attorney for the insurance company on the phone talking to her daugher about her sports activities.  I hate swimming by the way.  I always have.  And that is what I was stuck doing for years.  Stop punishing me for an accident I did not cause.  I am losing my mind.  I am not delusional about my talent.  And I think it is sick that there are insane people here who act like just knowing me would be detrimental to their career.  I also wonder if part of this has to do with my support of gay rights.  I am straight.  I am not devious at all.  I am just trying to do my goals and get the A.  I don’t cheat.  I have  a conscious that works.  It is obvious to me that others are not doing the right thing.<\/p>\n

I broke up with someone right before I got cancer.  It was for the best.  I did not want to burden anyone.  And I am not insane.  I am strong.  Let me act.  PLEASE.  Give me back my happiness and stop trying to convince others that I am ugly and should not be seen.  I mean from my perspective.  I am nice.  I am a beautiful person.  And those of you who want me hidden or to knock me down are the real evil people in this world.  You truly are……<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

What is wrong with this world.  I’ve lost everything, and I’ve never done anything wrong.  OK.  I am not perfect.  I am certainly not what my parents wanted.  I never was.  I was always...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1,27],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-519","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-acting","category-truth"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lauraanntull.com\/acting\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/519","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lauraanntull.com\/acting\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lauraanntull.com\/acting\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lauraanntull.com\/acting\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lauraanntull.com\/acting\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=519"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/lauraanntull.com\/acting\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/519\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":528,"href":"https:\/\/lauraanntull.com\/acting\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/519\/revisions\/528"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lauraanntull.com\/acting\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=519"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lauraanntull.com\/acting\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=519"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lauraanntull.com\/acting\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=519"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}